Timeshare Heaven, Part 2

The taxi dropped us off in front of Villas del Palmar in an area that was obviously the corral for the sheep whose herd we had just joined. We were deposited at a café table and as we watched the other confused-looking couples get swooped in on by young, good-looking English-speaking salespeople, we began to wonder what we’d gotten ourselves into. But the cheapskate in me was determined to get that $40 back.

Eventually a sweet-looking little girl came over and confirmed our identity. She brought us to a counter where another sweet-looking slightly older girl confirmed the details of what Hiram promised us - tickets for 2 to the Cabo Adventures zip line, a sunset dinner of steak and lobster, and a tour to the arches in a glass bottom boat. I didn’t even know about any of that except the zip line so I was thinking hey, maybe this is even better than I thought!

Once we were officially signed up, our card came up with the line of professionals - sales level two had now been reached. Enter Patty, a beautiful 30-something Mexican woman who spoke flawless English and happened to be massively pregnant. Right off the bat she told us that if we didn’t buy a timeshare she would go into labor before our very eyes and we’d have to help deliver the baby. Turns out her husband is from Seattle, a guy who moved here after just one vacation and now did timeshare sales as well. There are so many people with a Seattle connection here, we have run into them over and over.

Patty was really great. Funny, sparkly, and clearly everyone we walked by LOVED her. She encountered no less than 3 separate groups of people who were here using the timeshare they’d bought from her and she knew all of them by name, regardless of how long it had been since they first bought. This was pretty impressive to me, because it would have been a feat of amazing proportions for that to have been staged in any way.

Patty loaded us onto a cute little trolley that hauled us over to the opposite side of the property. Villa de Palmar was the first of these 3 big resorts located on the one swimmable beach in Cabo - Playa Medano. The middle resort was Villa La Estancia, all owned condos, and the one we were being taken to was Villa del Arco. The minute we walked through the lobby we looked at each other and started laughing - this pool was one of a handful that has a webcam that we have been OBSESSED with for the last few months. We looked up and located it immediately, solving a great mystery for Patty who was always being told by clients they could see her at work. Patty led us through the pool area, across the under-construction pirate ship bar that sits in the middle of the pool, and into the beachfront restaurant. She instructed us to load up on breakfast (way too American breakfast buffet) and she sat us down and commenced quizzing us about our vacationing life.

It was obvious the kinds of information she wanted and pretty clear where she was going with it, but her manner was so friendly and engaging that we just went right along with it. Patty is a serious professional. Turns out she was literally due in 5 days, but she has a 2 year old at home as well and said she had begged her boss to let her work as long as possible before she had to fully dedicate herself to new mommy domesticity. We finished up breakfast and she took us on a blissfully short tour of a couple different units - the big fancy 2 bedroom and the cheapie (relatively speaking) “Junior Suite” which is basically a hotel room with a very small kitchen.

This whole event was billed at 75 minutes tops, that was the commitment we made and everyone we ran into promised no more than 75 minutes and we’d get our free things and go. So far we were on schedule, which we were happy about. Patty escorted us back to the trolley and we returned to Palmar. She got off the trolley and started walking. And walking….and walking. Through the lobby, out to the pool, around the end of a building, in a doorway, through a hallway, up an elevator, down another hall. I wasn’t completely sure we were even still in Mexico, when we rounded a corner and Patty opened a door and said “This…is my office”.

It was a giant room full of tables, which were correspondingly full of couples each with their own Patty. The first thing you see upon entering the room is the very active bar. Bottles of champagne are being opened all over the place. Uh oh…….